Good Morning! 😘 I am leaning on the My Threefold tribe of mommas to get a little advice on my plan of action! Maybe I can gain some insight from the opinions of you guys! My kids are breaking me! I’m not just broke trying to support my boogie little beauties, I am B-ROKE. I’m attempting to sell the B off from the remainder of the word, kind of b-roke. 🤣🤣 However, I have a plan. I just need some feedback!
It would seem that my children, like most, don’t have a concept of how much money they receive each week for these items. Somehow, it’s never enough. I get calls saying “Momma, I need ….” A text request for my drive home from work, and empty promises filled with cleaning fairy dust and the return of the bowls from the burial ground under the beds in their room. Girls, are gross too, my friends, so freaking gross! 🤢🤮🤢
I am scared to see the results, but for the next week I am going to track exactly how much my kids spend on “luxury” items. I’m not talking about toilet paper or laundry detergent I’m talking about extra lunch/snack money for school, the fast food, requests for makeup, spending money, etc. All the crap they think they need to live their lives to the fullest, like Spotify premium or the unlimited data with 5g LTE, wifi, and the other seemingly priceless items some magical money fairy bestowed on our family of freeloaders! 🙄🙄
Once I show them how much they spent on their personal requests, I intend to show them how much it requires to provide the basic necessities like shelter, electricity, and those 30 minute blood of the dragon showers. The umpteen rolls of toilet paper that I feel are wadded around their hands in cast like fashion to protect their hands from the germs down under. I mean we do have soap, and ya know after you go around twice with Charmin it’s just a blanket you are using to soak up the pee! 💩💩💩 have no doubt that their cost of living is no where near the number they believe it is. They think they don’t have enough, but I see excess and moreover, wastefulness. I’m sure they aren’t intentional in their lackadaisical attitude surrounding their spending habits, just oblivious teenagers. 😒😒
My next step will be to show them how many hours I must work to provide them each the lifestyle they have grown accustomed to living at home. It’s time they see that money isn’t just waiting around for good use. In fact, it is very much earned by my hardworking, blood, sweat, tears, and my time away from them.
I am NOT trying to shame my kids for wanting more, but teach them that the price of tea and fine china 🥄🥄🥄 come with more than just a price to my financial account, but also to my physical and emotional bank account. 🤪😴🤑
The intent is to instill the value of a dollar earned. As a result, I hope they learn to be grateful, less entitled and more appreciative of the work that I put in to meet all of their needs. I don’t ask for much on return. I want respect, both of myself as their sugar momma, and of the property in which I have worked to acquire. Honestly, I think cleaning your room, keeping your own messes cleaned up, and completing one task that contributes to the household per day isn’t a BIG request. 🤔
How do you handle/did you handle chores, allowance, and get the compliance of your family? I don’t like to fight, I won’t argue or beg. I’m to the point, do it or don’t, but when you come asking I’ll mirror what decision I saw you make when I asked for your help.
😤🥱😫Mommin’ aint easy, but together, me and you, we’ve got this! ☮️❤️😊~M #makeitcount #moneymoves #keepingupwiththejoneses #mybrokebougiebrats #helpamommaout #mythreefold #broke
So here’s what I did, because I can relate to your situation WAAAAYYYYYY too much! All the way down to the dishes showing up in absolutely ridiculous places! I actually don’t allow food out of our kitchen/dining/living room area. And yet still stuff ends up in the bedrooms. Usually it’s Tupperware from a meal they took to school. Or candy wrappers that they “illegally” were eating in the rooms. Ugh. Will it ever end?
But aside from that, yes, spoiled kids who have no idea the value of $$$. I had the talk with them and discussed money. Made no difference. In my kid’s mind, specifically one of them, if the money is there, it’s meant to be spent. Said kiddo got a job last summer and earned $2500. Right now there’s about $5 in the bank account and probably 5-10 clothing items to show for it. Over $1000 spent on eating out over 6 months, and that’s all individually because when we eat out as a family I pay. Like really kid?
So I made sure their closets were adequate in the clothing department and then gave them $25/mo as a clothing allowance. Yes, that’s very small. But again, they don’t NEED any clothes. So that’s basically their spending money. The kid with the horrible habits just kept on spending thanks to that summer job. But now the end of the $$ has come and it’s starting to get real. And no, I won’t let them borrow. So if the friends want to go out and there isn’t $$ for them to join, that’s too bad. The unfortunate reality is that they won’t be smart with money until they feel the pain of not having any. There’s food at home. I cover shampoo and basics, but my brand. If they want a fancy brand or something not deemed a necessity, it comes from their budget. I’d really recommend that you consider giving this a try. Do all the math that you’re considering and have that conversation, and then figure out what is reasonable for them to spend each month according to your reality, not their current habits and not their desires. Make sure it’s less than what they currently spend. How much less is up to you. And then be clear on what you will cover and how often. (I’ll cover fun food like granola bars and juice, but only a certain number of containers a month. When it’s gone it’s gone or they spend their own money.) Because until they have to choose between a few things that they want, they won’t value it. Talking is great, it’s the experience that makes an impact in how they actually think and live. Good luck, mama! It’s a seriously tough job we have!